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[wipeyourfeet]

This is Wesley Mitchell. Please leave a message.

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because being a dick goes both ways

[mynameonyourpanties]

Yo man,

if you're going to come home from guard duty so late at night, mind not shaking the bed trying to climb to the top bunk?

And while I'm at it, learn to stop kicking the banisters in your sleep.

[inhumanity]

[A handwritten letter arrives at Wes's residence. The writing is flowing but legible cursive, but the writer periodically switches between red and green ink.

It's a Christmas greeting, all right.]

Dearest Wes,

You are most cordially invited to a celebration of family, friendship, forgiveness, and estrangement on December 17th from 3:00PM, or earlier, until whenever we feel like stopping, at [the address for the warehouse]. This season mustn't pass by without a grand affair full of of food and gift-giving, in the best of Christmas traditions.

Oh, but you don't have to bring gifts. There won't be any set gift-giving time. Besides, do you really want to give your friends presents so early? It's far better to make them wait until the 25th. Patience is an important quality to learn for the winter months. Of course, I'll prepare the food, unless you wish to contribute some. Please keep any amount of arsenic in food below fatal levels for human children!

In the spirit of Christmas and all ritualistic holidays designed to prepare communities for defence against a harsh winter of dangerous weather and low quantities of food, you are invited to bring anyone you feel like. While more people is a greater strain on resources, the contribution of any individual to the group balances that out with the warmth and love provided. Let's gather together and avoid a cruel death in the months to come.

Hoping for your presence and survival, your friend,
Christopher Chareau de Red

[post is here, tag in at your leisure or handwave or excuse yourself however you like!]

after they get christopher's letter; action

[mynameonyourpanties]

You're goin' to this party even if it means I have to drag you. Maybe you'll make a friend or two, get a girlfriend, something.

Text + image because yay roommates

[small_berserker]

I was told that ugly sweaters were the best way to spread holiday spirit so I got you a present. I hope you like it.

[inhumanity]

[At some point between the beginning of the 24th and the end of the 25th, Christopher delivers (handed off in person or left at a doorstep) a Christmas gift: cleaning supplies. It is given with all the best Christmas wishes from a friend... who gave Travis things to make everything dirty.]

PRETEND THIS IS ANONYMOUS AND NOT FROM YOUR EX WIFE GODFUCKINGDAMMIT

[lawgal]